Couples Therapy in California, Connecticut, Florida,New Jersey, and Oregon.

Relationship Coaching Nationally & Internationally

You just had another fight. The same arguments happen over and over; sometimes they are trivial and other times they are big, but they leave you both feeling misunderstood, dissatisfied, and discouraged.

Your relationship isn’t terrible or on the brink of falling apart, per se, but you are not having nearly as much connection and closeness as you had hoped or would like, both emotionally and physically.

You wait for the perfect moment to have the hard conversations, but that moment never happens. It all weighs heavily on your hearts and you can each feel the heaviness in the air, in the space between you on the bed, and in your own and the other’s eyes and face.

Doubt creeps in, resentment builds.

You are ready for a real change.

You both truly want this relationship to work. You can see being partners in life and having many adventures together; in fact it fills your heart with warmth and excitement thinking about building a life together…but something is missing and reading a book or taking a weekend workshop on how to have a successful relationship isn’t going to cut it.

What you want is help from someone who knows what they are doing—to help you examine and assess the good, the bad, and the ugly. Someone who is not afraid to get in the fray as needed to help you and your partner sort things out and guide you to learn how to do things differently.  

I am Phillip, and I Can Help.

I help couples who are struggling, in spite of their love and care for each other, to develop the different competencies and skills that make up a full and functional relationship system.  

From the first session, you will learn how to work together to really feel gotten by your partner. You will learn how to better understand and read each other by paying attention to not only what is expressed verbally but also by paying attention to the non-verbal expressions of voice tone, gesture, and posture, to name a few. You will learn how to understand each others words as well as the music behind the words.

Together we will explore, identify, and prioritize your relationship goals. Over time you will learn to not only identify the behaviors that are getting in the way of your goals but also develop the skills and capacities to reduce them and learn how to practice more functional alternatives. Within the structure that I provide, you will learn how to have constructive conversations about not only difficult topics and areas of conflict, but also about important and under-explored topics that may have been hard to have in the past.

I don’t just sit and nod my head— I am very active, engaging, and collaborate with you to figure out what really makes sense for your circumstances. There are no cookie cutter solutions here, because life is never that simple, but I do have a diverse range of tools and strategies at my disposal AND the intuition to help direct you to the right thing at the right time so you can get where you want to go.

I have been helping people address what is stopping them from pursuing what they want and feeling the way they want to feel for over two decades. I provide therapy services in CA, OR, CT and FL and relationship coaching across the United States and internationally.

Contact me for a free counseling consultation

It can feel like a big step to talk to a therapist, but I’ll make it easy. We’ll spend 30 minutes on the phone or in a video call and I’ll let you know if or how I can help. If I am not the right person, I’ll do my best to get you to the right person. Whether you are in the midst of a crisis, or at a point in which you simply want to begin to take more charge of you relationship I invite you to contact me for a free consultation to discuss if working together would be helpful.

Call or text me at (415) 574-0796 or email me at phillip@developingcloseness.com to set up your free initial consultation.

I offer individual, couples, and family therapy as well as relationship coaching.